I’ve finally learned that discomfort can be a state of mind. The last time I went to The Jamaican‘s house, my discomforts unexpectedly followed me there and taught me a lesson.
I arrived on Saturday evening by Go-Jek, of course, had a lovely dinner with The Jamaican and another house guest he had over, took a shower and went to bed. Imagine my surprise when I arose the next morning and stepped into the shower, only to see a roach scrambling around in there. Shock! Shock. Shock. Shock. Shock. SHOCK!
I couldn’t believe my eyes. The very thing I had been trying to escape by retreating to his house for the weekend had somehow found me. I was tempted to believe that it was a bad dream. I almost got back into bed. Seriously. I actually turned around and started back to bed. Then I stopped and let out a sigh. What was the point in trying to ignore it? The only place for it to go was into the bedroom where I would be lying in bed trying to act like it didn’t exist. I might as well deal with it and get it out of the way.
I’m not even going to pretend that I don’t get murder-y when it comes to roaches. I whacked it good, muttering at it the whole time, of course. Then I bemusedly took a shower, wondering the whole time if I had somehow brought that dratted pest with me from the centre (I’m pretty sure I didn’t – there’s no way I could have packed my stuff and not come across it. My backpack isn’t that big).
That was Sunday morning. Sunday night, a pest of another kind disturbed my sleep several times. It was a mosquito, of all things. I had sat in the courtyard all afternoon and not once been bothered by a mosquito. There in the air conditioning of The Jamaican’s guest bedroom, this mosquito wouldn’t leave me alone all night. It buzzed around my head and tried to crash land on my face several times during the night, awakening me and disturbing my sleep. This is something that happens at the centre from time to time. When it does, I simply change the angle of the fan to keep the pesky mosquito blown away from me, admittedly cursing it to damnation the entire time. But they only ever wake me up once there. At The Jamaican’s house, it’s air conditioning so there’s no changing the angle of a fan to blow a mosquito away. Who knew AC could have a disadvantage??
On Monday morning, I awoke with virtual bags under my eyes – they weren’t visible but I could feel them. I felt tired, even though I had slept for 8 or 9 hours. That dratted mosquito had disturbed my sleep too often. As I lay there trying to muster the energy and interest to get up, I thought about how stupid it is to try and outrun the things that make me feel uncomfortable. I even went so far as to think that, if not for my church visit on Sunday afternoon, I might as well have stayed at the centre.
Don’t get me wrong, I will always be murder-y towards roaches and mosquitoes – both are disease carrying killers, plus roaches are just ugly and gross. But how stupid it is when I try to outrun the things that make me uncomfortable. I may as well stay where I am and deal with them because they always show up in some other place. After all…
I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 (NKJV)
And I better not forget it.